The cricket world is in shock tonight with the breaking news that the ever reliable "News of the World" has snapped pictures of Shane Warne in a London based training facility having a series of intensive net sessions designed to whip him back into wicket taking shape. This can only mean one thing: he is making a comeback for the Ashes.
The news is especially bad for England as the story reveals that Warnie's training partner is none other than unemployed mid 40s London housewife, Liz Hurley. It is well known that the Mad Rooter plays his very best cricket when he is well and truly on the tools (see the 2005 Ashes for reference) so lining up Liz can be only terrible news for Andrew Strauss.
Well done Shane, your nation salutes you. At 41 years of age, to submit yourself to the rigours of Test match level training is almost beyond the call of duty. True, you explain, in sometimes slightly too much detail, that the Wife's best friend can also be her worst nightmare, but your commitment to the cause is unable to be matched.
Shane shows off some of the award winning preparation methods that helped him to 708 Test wickets
On a slightly more serious note (if one can ever be serious when it comes to Shane) is this really much of a scandal? Training partner Liz is separated from her husband and if Shane's wife was ever really silly enough to take him back then she has kicked him to the curb yet again now. So what we have here is really two single people getting together for a couple of nights and getting photographed. In all honesty, surely the scandal is that Warnie can land ladies of the calibre of Ms Hurley.
Shane finally shows the world the source of all the misunderstanding: that bloody Joe the cameraman
Final point: I know I probably gush a tad too much but as I don't have much time due to impending BBQ duties I need to point you to a couple of Peter Roebuck articles that have again stood out amongst my cricket reading.
The first is a wonderful examination of the confusion of Australia's focus on youth without the deeper thinking to make it successful (such as considering technique and mental strength in my opinion). For example:
"And what had they done? It is not enough to be young"
I just know he wanted to add " ... or have a pussycat tattoo or blond highlights" at the end.
The second is a perhaps even more wonderful explanation of what it is to be professional in the world of cricket. By way of teaser:
"Professionalism is a state of mind, not a pay packet. It's the sort of attitude that allowed Stuart Clark to bowl to his field at North Sydney Oval yesterday, pushing the straight men back to the boundary and keeping a full length ... Money has nothing to do with it. Professionalism means turning up every day ready to give it everything. Pride is the paymaster"
Too right maestro, too bloody right.
Off to the gas 4 burner with some beef marinated in garlic and ginger.
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