Sensing my melancholy, my English father in law showed some support for the Australian team prior to our trip to the upcoming Sydney Test
And so the Ashes are decided for another couple of years.
As I predicted England would win this series 2-1 quite a while ago, I have had a long time to get ready for the pain. Even so, I admit to feeling a pang of depression when I read the words "....AND ENGLAND HAVE RETAINED THE ASHES" upon the dismissal of Ben Hilfenhaus. Reading the last rites on my mobile phone whilst exploring Dangar Island with my in-laws and family provided some distraction, but it was all I could do to stop myself tearing down some of the multi-coloured hand-knitted woollen scarves that the island dwelling aged hippies had wrapped around each of the roughly 10 street signs on the island in an attempt to make myself feel a little better. Thankfully, the thought of my in-laws reporting back on the crazed Australian son-in-law's run in with a posse of 75 year old hippies made me see sense and I maintained a silent, brooding rage instead, stopping occasionally to kick a small yappy dog when the opportunity occasionally arose.
For all of our posturing before this series, it might be worth remembering that England have now won three of the last four Ashes contests. If they are the 4th best Test team in the world at the moment then either the top three are very, very good indeed or there is a huge amount of daylight between 4th and Australians in 5th.
English wicketkeeper Matt Prior takes the catch that almost launched a hippie posse attack
I have come to the conclusion that some of my darker moments of angst and anger about the Australian performance may, at times, come across as though I believe that the only reason we have lost is our own incompetence. This is not true, I think England are a very good team. So, in the spirit of being outplayed rather than simply under-performing, I thought it might be useful to touch on the reasons England won.
How did England beat us? Let me count the ways.
Management
England arrived weeks early and played three serious matches and played them to win. We recovered from a 2 Test series, plus a few meaningless one dayers, against India in India in conditions about as far removed from Australian as possible.
Whilst England plotted well and selected an excellent team for Australian conditions, including a very tall bowling line up, we recovered from injuries to just about everyone. We then sacked our number 1 spinner based on two poor matches against India (which every foreign spinner to play there has also experienced), decided our best bowler was unfit for the first Test and picked Michael Clarke despite a back injury that rendered him almost unable to walk.
In short, England were prepared and we were in disarray. Almost all of these things were choices, things within each team's control. This wasn't luck, it was just good work from England and bad work from us. Their preparation was so good in fact that they didn't miss a beat with the loss of two first choice bowlers. I have a suspicion that England could have lost all four front line bowlers and still beaten us with four replacements that performed when called upon.
In addition to the general management of the team, the specialist coaching of the English team produced great results. Their bowlers were a cut above ours and built pressure. They also got the ball to swing far more than us. This isn't black magic, it is just teachable technique. Is Troy Cooley still our bowling coach? If so, I here and now declare him a total myth. David Saker did a great job for the English, we got one good innings out of Mitchell Johnson and one or two good bowling performances from others and that is about it.
Speaking of coaches, the sooner we get rid of Justin Langer as our batting coach, the better. Graeme Gooch has done an excellent job with the English team. They seem to have focused on concentration, shot selection and making the bowlers bowl to them. No catches in the slips to wide half volleys off Johnson for them. Meanwhile, Langer seems to have concentrated on overly emotional man love. From misdirected rubbish such as wanting Philip Hughes to "dance" when he received short stuff from the English (I thought not missing straight ones or flashing at wide ones might have been better advice) to the simply bizarre like
"Like yin and yang, black and white, love and hate, there are always two sides to every story.
As England walked their lap of honour I put my arm around my besieged captain and friend Ricky Ponting and reminded him that winning is so much more fun than losing"
Umm, thanks Justin, insightful. I hoped you mentioned the value of throwing out the cream cakes after poor batting displays at some point also.
Anyway, Gooch: fantastic coach. Langer: figure of fun
Leadership
This one is simple. On the field, England looked at ease with each other and happy. They also rarely dropped their heads and recovered well from the Perth defeat. This can only be down to the leadership team of Strauss and Flower. I long said Strauss should be captain, before the KP affair in fact. He holds his place in the team easily as a batsman alone and is a calm figure, with enough ego to be successful but not enough to render him unable to lead effectively.
As for Flower: Look, anyone who takes his life into his hands by protesting against his own government is made of strong stuff. Running a tour to Australia probably seems easing compared to some of the the things that came earlier in his life. He seemed organised and in control throughout.
In contrast, Ponting argued with umpires, struggled with the bat and clearly had lost control of both the team and its morale a number of times. Our coach, Tim Neilson, well, I dunno. Did anyone see him? Did he do anything? He seems like the sort of bloke that hung out against the wall during his High School dance whilst the cool kids swept in and whisked the ladies away into the night.
Partnerships
In both batting and bowling England worked in partnerships and created pressure. Again, this isn't magic, it is practise and application. This showed a little bit of mental fragility on our part and we cracked both when fielding and when batting.
Fielding
This deserves a special mention. For the first time since, well, ever, England out-fielded and out caught the Australians. Both wicket-keepers were surprisingly good, and were probably even gloves wise, but England's fielding, and catching in particular, far and away outshone the Australians. I don't know who the fielding coach for England is but they have done a wonderful job to move them from the days when England blamed "too much blue sky" for dropping catches (Brisbane, 2002 / 2003 if memory serves) to the display in this series.
Maybe Australia might want to move away from a fielding coach who has never caught a ball without a glove. I am sure a baseball bloke was useful 10 years ago in helping us improve our throwing but surely, surely, surely, we need someone who can help us get our catching levels up to scratch again. Bob Simpson hit about 85,000 balls into the air and got us up to scratch in the 80s through sheer hard work. Perhaps we employ an excellent catcher like Mark Taylor to do the same from 2011 onwards.
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There are no doubt many more reasons that could be nominated but they are my main ones. England outplayed Australia in all facets of the game and must be congratulated. Well done to them.
The Graeme Swann lead English Haka did the trick on the morning of the 4th day of the Melbourne Test match
As for Sydney, well at least my pick, Usman Khawaja, gets a go in the 5th Test. This guy is class, lets just make sure we set him up to succeed. He could be the beginning of our resurgence if we manage him correctly.
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